Dining Out–Vegan-style

It sucks.

No really, it sucks. You don’t have to think very hard about it to understand why. The majority of restaurants don’t offer vegan options, even in a city such as Pittsburgh. TGI Friday’s, Red Lobster, Ruby Tuesdays, etc. What do you get at these places? Meat, seafood, burgers. You’re not going to find tofu or seitan, and while you might find a veggie burger some of the time, it’s usually pretty gross and more often that not, vegetarian instead of vegan.

Disclaimer: I don’t ask too many questions when dining out. If something could be vegan, is likely to be vegan, or is not clearly not vegan, I’m gonna assume–sometimes incorrectly–that it’s vegan. On menus that literally don’t have anything to indicate vegan options, if it’s marked vegetarian and does not obviously involve eggs or cheese, it’s good enough for me.


Take the above for instance. This was today at BD’s Mongolian Grill (which is yummy if you happen to have one near you). Despite having an entire salad-bar stand full of different types of animal flesh, they still had tofu and, awesomely, it was on the veggie stand. Now, is the shitake mushroom sauce or the chili garlic sauce (both of which are mixed in my dish) vegan? Probably. Maybe. Perhaps there’s butter involved. Maybe even chicken broth, for all I know. But it didn’t apparently involve either of these things so I’m happily ignorant and assuming otherwise. The alternative is to grill my waitress (bad pun intended) and nobody wants that.

That said, when I took my bowl of plant matter up to the grill and Grillin’ Dude saw my tofu, he asked if I was vegetarian or vegan. I said I was and he offered to use separaters to ensure that my food didn’t touch any neighboring food that involved meat. I told him I didn’t care but that was super awesome of him and he got a bigger tip because of it.

Now, even with my supremely lax standards when eating out, frequently I find myself limited to ordering solely from the side menu. If I’m lucky, the side menu involves some kind of beans (sans bacon or ham) because protein, but I have on more than one occasion sat there munching French fries while everyone else ate their meal.

LiveKindly has been sharing videos and articles recently claiming that veganism is set to be 2018’s megatrend. I don’t know if I believe that, but at the same time, with so many efforts being taken to promote plant-based alternatives–Impossible Foods, for instance–maybe it is true, and maybe that will bring more vegan options to the larger chain restaurants.

That is, until millennials finish killing them off, just like we did with fabric softener, the diamond industry, department stores, and good old fashioned family values.

Go us, I say! Especially if we successfully make dining out as a vegan less sucky.


Friends, Not Food

I’m sorry to say that my posts for the next month or two are likely going to be far more sporadic than they already are. I’m going to try not to let that happen, but a few things have changed since my last post.

Firstly, while I’ve been lucky at work to only have to cover a specific type of sales chat, of which there are usually only a dozen or two spread out over the fifteen hours that we’re open for chats, that is on hiatus until July or August. Or, to put it another way, I actually have to do real work again until that’s reinstated. I was using my downtime at work to blog, but I don’t have downtime anymore.

That’s the first reason why the posts may slow down.

The other reason is a lot more exciting and way more adorable:

I GOT A PUPPY! (Like my cats, she’s also not a vegan.)

Her name is Morgan and she’s an eight(ish) week old pit bull, black lab mix. Since we’re in the middle of potty training, most of my free time goes to her. My cats are not at all pleased with this squirmy little ball of energy, and because she is currently the size of a small rabbit, two of my cats (namely Kitten and Geno) could literally kill her. So, constant vigilance is required.

Other than puppy news, I’ve been a vegan for just shy of two months now and have only deliberately eaten non-vegan foods once. Prior to picking up the puppy, I even trusted myself to go to Moe’s Southwest Grill on Saturday and not get their liquid crack otherwise known as queso dip.


Instead I got a burrito bowl with cilantro lime rice, black beans, pico de gallo, seasoned tofu, and guac. Plus the chips, more guac (instead of queso) and literally the best tomatillo salsa I’ve ever had in life.

Since Saturday, it’s been ridiculously hot, and since I don’t have central air, I haven’t been doing any cooking beyond that which can be done in a microwave. I did have my second salad ever since becoming a vegan, with some vegan steak strips I found at Walmart of all places, plus some leftover Hardee’s French fries, grape tomatoes, scallions, chow mein noodles and vegan ranch.


In fact, I’ll probably have the exact same thing for dinner today because it’s still hot and I still have leftover fries.

Anyways, blog friends, please forgive my absence for a little while. Much like Arnold, I’ll be back.

Additions–Both to the Blog and to my Belly

I finally decided to stop thinking about adding a Recipes section of the blog and actually follow through on it. You can find it over there on the right side of the page. The plan is to add to that one lonely recipe there, both in future posts and by going back to some previous ones where I talked about yummy foods.

I said it before and I’ll say it again: Sharing is caring. Plus, a lot of vegan food is really freaking good.

Sidenote: Don’t feel left out, omnivores. Since I live with and cook for someone who eats meat and cheese n’at, I may include a note at the end of the recipes on good ways to incorporate tasty animal flesh.

Side-sidenote: If I ever become the kind of militant vegan that goes around saying “Everyone should be vegan!” or, to put it another way, “My lifestyle choices are better than yours so be like me!” someone, please, hit me with something.

Anywho, let’s move on to the yummy-in-my-tummy stuff!

I literally just finished eating some of what I’m going to call “Beany Quinoa” and I liked it so much I decided I had to share this one. You’ve heard of red beans and rice? This is basically that, only without the sausage and, you know, the rice.


I’ve been vegan for about two months now and this is actually the first time in life that I’ve tried quinoa. Take that stereotypes! That said, I’m a fan. I’ll be enjoying more of it now that I know what I’ve been missing.

Speaking of other things I’ve been missing, let’s talk about cheese again, eh?

I know what you’re thinking. “Oh sweet lord, please, don’t let her whine about cheese more. Either eat some or get over it by now!”

Well, I kind of did both! See, I went on Vegan Essentials to order a specific brand of vegan cheese, which they happened to be out of at the time. Being somewhat of an online-shopping addict, I glanced over the other vegan cheeses and ended up ordering a “smoked gouda” which cost way too much money and then required two-day shipping on top of it.

Totes worth it! I had me some cheese and crackers for lunch today.


The texture is more like that of a spreadable cheese, which we all know that gouda is not. Also, it doesn’t actually taste anything like gouda–smoked or otherwise. That’s not the point though. The point is that it is vegan cheese and it is yummy.

Last but not least here, sometimes you just want a good cheeseburger, and sometimes, even though you’re vegan, you can have one. Observe!



It’s a black bean patty made by Lightlife foods and it was so good I’ll be getting more of them when I get groceries this weekend. The cheese-like yummy gooeyness on top is another product I got from Vegan Essentials. I don’t remember the official name but it was basically smoked cheddar cheese in a jar, much like queso dip.

Granted, it doesn’t taste like queso dip, and honestly, on its own it doesn’t even taste very good. However, on a burger, it is marvelous because it adds both cheesy texture and smoky flavor.

So much yum!

Wheat Meat and Chik’n


I mentioned in my last post that seitan experiments would once again take place in my kitchen despite previously swearing it off.

Incentive: I still have some leftover tzatziki sauce my aunt made and what better use for it than to make a gyro?

With Google’s help, I found a seitan recipe that called itself “vegan gyro meat” and then I found two others just to see what the differences were. Then, using good old fashioned ingenuity, I took the best things about each of them and made yet another attempt at homemade seitan.


I’ll say it again. Eureka!

This log of  wheat meat doesn’t have that wheaty, gluteny taste I’ve previously complained about, and once you take those slices there and cook them in a little bit of oil and some more spices, you get something a lot like gyro meat. And then, if you’re really lucky, you have some actual awesome sauce leftover and you can make yourself a vegan gyro!


Stuff like this, ladies and gentlemen, makes being a vegan really easy and really delightful.

Unfortunately, while I still have more seitan and tzatziki sauce, I am out of pita bread. I see a trip to the grocery store in my future.

Speaking of the grocery store, I bought a bunch of different faux meats a few weeks ago and most of them are kind of icky, for lack of a better word. However, because my kitchen is bereft of pita bread or, for that matter, any other type of bread, I decided to make a wrap today with some MorningStar vegan chik’n strips.

I have some other MorningStar faux meats shoved in the freezer and based on my experience with them up till now, I wasn’t exactly excited to try these.

Let me just say that I should have been. Get a load of this:


I took one bite of this, yelled “How is this not chicken?!” and then immediately pulled the bag out of the freezer to re-read it and make sure I hadn’t accidentally bought actual chicken strips.

Sure enough, it’s soy. It’s actually, for realz, soy. But soy oh boy my friends (he he!), it’s basically chicken minus the death. Now I want to find an omnivorous friend, make them this exact wrap, tell them it’s chicken, and see if they can tell. My guess is that they couldn’t.

Thirty-One Years Alive

My birthday was Friday, so I’m officially “in my thirties” now. No more of the “I just turned 30” crap. (Boo.)

Instead of relaxing, I spent my birthday getting sunburnt by pulling weeds and planting flowers, and I have to say: I definitely underestimated my flower gardens in a big way. After three hours of blood, sweat, and tears, I still didn’t get all the flowers in the ground. I may even have to admit defeat and make a couple of DIY baskets and just put mulch down because I had no idea there were going to be so many freaking rocks in the ground.

I’d post a picture so you could see all the pretty petunias in my back yard now, but owing to some lawnmower trouble, the boyfriend didn’t get the backyard mowed.

Sidenote: By “lawnmower trouble” I mean that we don’t have one, so you can see the trouble. We do have an electric weedwacker, but we didn’t acquire a long enough extension cord before it started raining.

After earning sunburn and almost heat stroke, we ventured forth in part to get an extension cord and also to get dinner. We went to a place in Cranberry Township called Double Wide Grill. The ambience of said place is a little horrifying because if you hadn’t guessed based on the name, they’re going for “Hick Chiq” which is just weird. I guess it’s what the yuppy rich folks of Cranberry Township call “slummin’ it.”

But the food. Oh my goodness the food.

First of all, while I had eaten there before back in my om-nom-nomivore days, I didn’t actually pay any attention to the vegan and vegetarian options this place offers.


That’s right, folks. Two pages of deliciousness. I’m so used to having to make due with a black bean burger or, failing that, some form of potato when we eat out that I literally couldn’t contain my excitement.

We started with some honey garlic seitan “wings”:


There were more than this on the plate, I promise, but I was too excited about it to remember to take a picture before we ate half of them.

Sidenote: I know honey isn’t vegan, but I’ve decided that I’m going to ignore that rule. The reason is that I can’t stomach the hypocrisy of “but the bees!” and then pointedly and deliberately murder any stink bugs I find in my house.

After we shared that appetizer (which the boyfriend said was weird but fine), then came the main course:


Vegan Philly Cheesesteak with fries!

Now, I don’t know in what world a cheesesteak is swimming in barbecue sauce, but I also don’t really care. That bun was overflowing with seitan steak, vegan cheese sauce, peppers, and onions, and I ate every single scrap of it, plus all the fries.

That makes twice in one day that I had seitan so I now I know it can be freaking yummy. There will be further seitan experiments in my kitchen now.

Moving on to Saturday, after I put in six hours of overtime in the home office, I headed up north to my home town for a cookout with some friends and family. I took my vegan cookies, and while I knew that there would be veggie burgers for me to eat (while everyone else ate fifty dead chickens worth of wings), I decided I wanted to be able to eat more than just a burger, so I made some vegan potato salad and brought that with me. Not only that but one of my friends made vegan stuffed mushrooms as well.

The end result was that while the veggie burgers weren’t very good (but the potato salad and the mushrooms were), there was enough food for me to resist the tantalizing smell of fried chicken wings.

Not going to lie; I was proud of myself. Also, the vegan cookies were a hit. So were my friend’s mushrooms, for that matter. Everybody had a good time and went home with a full belly.

Then came Sunday. What? Your birthday celebrations don’t span three straight days? You’re doing it wrong, I tell you!

On Sunday, my aunt, who traditionally cooks me a birthday dinner every year because she’s awesome like that, made me a vegan dinner, which makes her even more awesome.

We started out with falafel and vegan tzatziki sauce (which, by the way, is literally awesome sauce).


Now, I’ve had falafel before and I’ve never been super impressed with it. This, however, this is the stuff dreams are made of. Up until that point, it was the best thing I’d eaten since that mushroom pot pie in my previous post.

Next came the main course, somen noodles with veggies and a very spicy peanut sauce.


Fun fact: This one was actually hers because my over-eager self had already dug into mine and completely forgot to take a picture. I’d been planning on making this myself but she beat me to it. Plus, she sent me home with leftovers to boot!

Last, but certainly not least was dessert: Dark chocolate sorbet.


Take a moment and just look at that. I’ll wait.

I’m serious. It deserves a moment of appreciation.

Are you drooling yet? I am.

If you had asked me after the falafel if there was any possible way that whatever dessert was forthcoming could possibly compete with the falafel as my favorite dish of the meal, I’d have said heck no. I’m not really a sweet-loving kind of gal and while I certainly do like me some chocolate, I would never call myself a chocoholic.

This, though–this sorbet, this godly concoction of cocoa and Kalua and cinnamon and whatever else, this was literally divine. Like, if Heaven could be said to have a taste, it would taste like this.

It was so delicious that I don’t even have a witty or eloquent way to wrap up this blog post because I’m so lost in the memory of that literal scoop of heaven.

Just look at that picture some more and dream.

So Much Foods!

My duct taped wagon seems to be holding, which proves that duct tape can fix anything! Even metaphorical duct tape and a metaphorical wagon.

I’ve done a crazy amount of cooking and even baking over the weekend, mostly to avoid having to do so during the week while I’m working and so that I have food to eat.


This was dinner on Sunday. Spinach and mushroom pot pie with phyllo/filo dough to top it. This was super delicious and even though the boyfriend didn’t touch it (he hates mushrooms), there are no leftovers because OM NOM NOM!

Sidenote: I posted this picture in the Facebook group What FAT Vegans Eat and people are apparently really adamant about their particular spelling of phyllo or filo.

Anyways, I felt like baking yesterday, so I made my first attempt at vegan cookies. I made chocolate chip and double chocolate chunk ones. The texture is more cake-like, but the taste is fantastic!

Sidenote: Egg-free cookie dough is a guilt-free indulgence on more than one level! Also, licking the beaters is still the best part!

Also, made bread yesterday, as you can see it cooling next to the cookies. That’s less interesting. I bake bread every week now that I have a bread machine.

Lastly, for the pièce de résistance: MAC N CHEEZE!!! Also chick’n nuggets which weren’t great, but who cares. Mac n cheeze!


Of course it’s not real cheese. It was actually a sauce made with potatoes, carrots, onion, garlic, cashews, and a few spices all thrown into a blender along with some water and oil. I even found milk-free bread crumbs to make it look all authentic and stuff! Sure, it doesn’t taste like cheese, but it is freaking yummy! I think next time I make it, I’m going to add some nutritional yeast as well.

The chick’n nuggets (TVP, chickpea flour, flax eggs) were a little disappointing. I didn’t add enough seasonings so they didn’t taste like much. Plus, the texture was too goopy on the inside for chicken nuggets. Oh well! The mac n cheeze more than made up for it!

Another challenge looms, however. Friday is my birthday. It’s supposed to thunderstorm. Otherwise, I’d be posting my excitement for my plans to visit Phipps Conservatory with the boyfriend and then grab dinner at a trendy vegan place on the south side of Pittsburgh called “The Zenith.”

However, if the weather forecast remains the same, I can’t very well go to an outdoor garden. Those plans will happen eventually, but maybe not on my birthday itself like I’d hoped. The challenge, however, is for the day after my birthday.

I’m headed back up to New Castle to hang with some friends and have a barbecue-picnic thing. I froze most of my vegan cookies to bring with me so I’ll at least have sweet-tooth snacking satisfaction. Also, they were cool enough to acquire some form of vegan burger product for me to content myself with and even went so far as to ask about vegan buns to boot.

But the challenge is that they are going to be enjoying chicken wings and jello shots. Here’s hoping that duct tape keeps holding strong!

Let’s Not Meat, ‘kay?

My meat craving has subsided at long last. I managed to stay strong and not touch the remains of the turkey club in the fridge and the piece of steak the boyfriend brought home Monday and didn’t eat until today. I feel super accomplished.

Really though, it’d be great if I could get to the point where meat grosses me out. I don’t think that’ll ever happen though, if I’m being honest here. It’s just too tasty.

I joined a Facebook group recently called “What F.A.T. Vegans Eat” which is fantastic. It’s literally just a bunch of vegans posting pictures of whatever vegan delights they happen to be enjoying at the time. Not only does it make me feel like veganism is this really awesome club I’ve joined, it’s also given me some really good recipes and food ideas!

I’m in the middle of another test of willpower as I write this though. I just finished eating the last of the leftover TVP Sloppy Joe mix over rice with broccoli. It was tasty, but I’ve eaten it for dinner for the last three days and I’m REAL tired of it.


That’s not the test though. The test is that there was only enough for one more dish of this stuff, so rather than travel forth to acquire food for himself, the boyfriend made and is currently in the process of eating a pepperoni and cheese pizza.

Oh my gosh, the smell of it is divine.

I’m actually really full, plus everything I’ve eaten today has made me feel a little sick to my stomach, so I’m not going to cave. But why does it have to smell so good? I told him previously that he wasn’t allowed to make the frozen pizzas until I gave the go ahead because I wasn’t sure my willpower was up to it.

Pizza may not be my favorite food ever, but it’s still freaking pizza.

He got the go ahead tonight though. Hopefully he eats the whole thing. He won’t. I know he won’t, but a girl can dream, right?